grateful | Radhanath Swami | Marriage and Parenting Advice

Thank you God for everything!

‘It doesn’t take a great person to blame others or to complain, but it takes a very very great person to thank god in difficulties.’ – Radhanath Swami

According to our karmas (manifest/unmainfest effects of our actions), we have a particular destiny. But however good our karma is, there will be honor and distress, pleasure and pain, success and failure, heat and cold etc because this is a world of dualities. You cannot have one without the other. But if you become attached to the positive side, to that degree you will suffer when the negative side inevitably comes before us. The solution to this is given by Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita, He tells us that we should transcend the dualities of life. But, how to transcend dualities of love/hate in a marriage or happiness/ distress in the work place or pride/humility when we have competition or pleasure/pain while raising children?

We can transcend dualities by seeing the Lord in everything, by looking upon circumstances in our lives as His mercy that has come to help us grow into a beautiful person, beyond our vision. And when we learn to offer the fruits of our action as an act of service for god, we can instantly transcend the dualities of material existence and enter the divine realm, beyond love/hate relationships and we are then able to see the other person as a gift of God who has come to us to help us get over our own anarthas (contamination’s) that block our spiritual growth.

tat te ‘nukampäà su-samékñamäëo

bhuïjäna evätma-kåtaà vipäkam

håd-väg-vapurbhir vidadhan namas te

jéveta yo mukti-pade sa däya-bhäk.

(Srimad Bhagvatam 10:14:8)

Radhanath Swami explains,“When a person is undergoing serious tribulations, and in that condition with folded palms and tears of sincerity in his heart he thanks god saying I deserved worst, but I know my lord you have a purpose behind this and I am grateful.”

– Mrs. Preethi Dhiman

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Gratitude

Attitude of Gratitude: No.1 success factor in a marriage

Gratitude is to seek beyond the immediate circumstances that come upon us, and to actually seek the essence of that situation- Radhanath Swami

Gratitude, is a quality of the heart. Radhanath Swami says, “If we want true progress, we must develop this quality, especially in a husband-wife relationship, for it is one of the most important success factors in a marriage.” Without gratitude, even in the most favorable situation in our marriage, we cannot really progress. When we are ungrateful, even if we have the best companion, we start to complain and blame the other. Without gratitude, you cannot satisfy the heart. Because whatever you get, you feel you deserve better and you want something more. To seek the essence is real wisdom, and the essence of every situation is that we can feel and find a beautiful opportunity to grow—if we are grateful.

The universal principle of all spiritual paths and a very basic principle that Sri Bhagavad Gita teaches us is that we should be grateful for whatever God gives us. Radhanath Swami teaches us how to learn to feel grateful. He says when good things come our way, we should think,”I don’t deserve this, but I am so grateful.” Any little bit of kindness that a person shows us, we should be grateful. Any blessing we receive we should be grateful. And when difficulties, pain, or failures cross our paths, we must learn to be grateful for those as well. For we could learn and we could grow through that invaluable experience. Otherwise, we miss a precious chance. By learning to be grateful, we learn to come closer to our spouse and understand them better. Eventually, with a grateful heart, one can even come closer to God Himself. Thus, by nurturing the quality of Gratitude, we improve the qualities of our own lives & it enables us to overcome the obstacles that keep us from our progress.

– Mrs. Preethi Dhiman

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