satisfaction | Radhanath Swami | Marriage and Parenting Advice

The 99 Club

Everyone is working for peace and satisfaction. If we do not find great satisfaction within our souls then we are much affected and afflicted by the circumstances surrounding us. The key to real peace is within and not without.—Radhanath Swami.

Once upon a time, there lived a King who, despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content. One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily while he worked. This fascinated the King; why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy.

Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor. After hearing the King’s woes and the servant’s story, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club.”

“The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?” the King inquired. The advisor replied, “Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant’s doorstep.”

When the servant opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy… So many gold coins! He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins. He wondered, “What could’ve happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!”

He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive. Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection.

From that day, the servant’s life was changed. He was overworked and chastised his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin. He stopped singing while he worked.

Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled. When he sought his advisor’s help, the advisor said, “Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club.” He continued, “The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never contented, because they’re always yearning and striving for that extra 1 telling to themselves: ‘Let me get that one final thing and then I will be happy for life .’

“We can be happy, even with little, but the minute we’re given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt our family; all these as a price for our growing needs and desires. That’s what joining The 99 Club is all about.”

The Fire Extinguisher

Even pleasant sweet aromatic breezes can cause dry wood to catch fire and destroy the forest. – Radhanath Swami.

A saint asked his disciples, ‘Why do people shout at each other when they are angry? Why shout when the other person is just next to you?’ Disciples gave some answers but none satisfied the saint. Finally the saint explained, ‘When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they need to raise their voice. The angrier they are, the greater the heart-distance, and the stronger they have to shout to make themselves heard.’

Everyone in this material world wants to be a little God – “I am the enjoyer, I am the center, I am the controller”. Such egoistic sentiments are like dry sticks of firewood stacked up inside the heart. With both spouses in this mood, many marital problems start as little fights over trifling disagreements. These trifles are the breezes that rub the ego and produce sparks. And it doesn’t take much time for sparks to cause raging fires. Sometimes, even very sweet aromatic breezes with so many fragrances can somehow cause egos to rub and cause a wild fire.

Radhanath Swami notes that whenever pure spiritual topics are discussed, the participants forget all kinds of material hankering, at least for the time being. Not only that, they give up their envy towards one another, and their anxiety and fear evaporates. In the Bhagavat Gita (10.9), Krishna explains: “the thoughts of My pure devotees always dwell in Me, their lives are devoted in serving Me, and they derive great satisfaction and bliss coming together conversing about Me, discussing about Me, and chanting My names”.

This, then, is the most effective fire extinguisher for the matters of the heart: association of devotees, coming together and discussing God, chanting His names, and inspiring one another to serve Him. This is where real pleasure resides.

The winds of petty disagreements can never ignite a wild fire in the hearts thus drenched by loving sentiments for God and each other. Instead, the soft hearts would easily be able to tolerate the onslaught of stormy disagreements by sticking together in the service of God.