Categories
Love

Ripples in the pool

God The Center“Like a radio antenna constantly emitting circles of energy, our hearts naturally want to constantly expand our feelings of love” — Radhanath Swami.

An infant thinks only about its own desires and needs. But as the child grows older, its loving propensity begins to expand. It wants to share what it has with others, wants to play with others, and wants to develop relationships with others. Its affection could expand, starting from its parents, to friends, to community, to nation, to humanity, and even to all living beings.

Despite this natural propensity of love to expand, why is there so much frustration in our attempts to find love? Rather, there is disunity within this world on every level: economically, politically, socially and even within the family. Why? Because of a missing common center. An example will illustrate this. When we throw a pebble in a swimming pool, the ripples expand to the brink of that pool. But if the ripples created by different pebbles have different centers, they will collide.

Similarly, in marital relationships, if the desires of both the husband and wife don’t expand from a common center, there will be clashes. There will be frustration as repeated attempts to find true love fail. The solution is to find a common centre. And what is the common centre? According to Bhagvad Gita, and according to every scripture in the world, God is the common centre. If one learns to love God, one will automatically love His parts and parcels – and most definitely, the spouse too.

 

Categories
Appreciate

The Wisdom of the Porcupines

God awards those who weathered all their differences to base their life on a higher principle, with deep affection and love for each other. Then marriage becomes a wonderful experience.-Radhanath Swami

 

To forget our mundane differences or to learn to tolerate them with a sense of responsibility towards each other becomes very easy when we lead a life with a higher goal. And when that higher goal is directed towards love of God, we gradually develop faith and loyalty towards each other. We soon become the best of friends, and those little differences seem much more tolerable than before.

 

A story: one winter, many animals died because of cold. The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their closest companions even though they gave off heat to each other. Because they could not tolerate this pain after a while, they decided to distance themselves from the other and soon they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth. Wisely, they decided to go back to being together and learned to live with the little wounds that were caused by the close relationship with their companion, but the most important part of it was the heat that came from the others. In this way they were able to survive.

 

Moral of the story: The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but the best is when each individual learns to live with the imperfections of others and can admire the other person’s good qualities. In other words: Learn to love the pricks in your life.

 

Categories
Radhanath Swami Tolerate

Aspire to be a china cup

China Cup“For a relationship like marriage to work in this world, it is very difficult! In fact, for anything great to work in this world, it is very difficult.”-Radhanath Swami

If we want a relationship to have deep substance, deep meaning and deep fulfillment, difficulties have to be endured. Just like the beautiful china cup which was once just a lump of red clay. The potter rolled it, pounded and patted it over and over, though the lump of clay did not like it. And that was not the end. The potter then placed it on a spinning wheel, spun that clay to dizzying speed, poked, prodded and bent the clay out of shape to suit his needs. The potter then put the clay in the oven and treated it to torturous heat. Though it went through unbearable times, there was more in store. The clay was put through cold treatment, brushed and painted with choking fumes, and laid back in the oven twice as hot. When the clay thought what was next, the potter placed it before a mirror and in that mirror it saw the unbelievable. The red lump of clay had transformed into the most beautiful china cup!

God knows what he’s doing for each of us. He is the potter, and we are his clay. He will mould us and expose us to pressures of just the right kinds that we may be made into a flawless piece of work to fulfill his good, pleasing and perfect will. So, when life seems hard, and you are being pounded and patted and pushed almost beyond endurance; when your world seems to be spinning out of control; when you feel like you are in a fiery furnace of trials, just know that at the end of it all, your life is set to be transformed into something beautiful that you never imagined.

When we endure difficulties in our relationships knowing for a fact that it will help us grow into a beautiful person, God enables us to grow.